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Making a Positive Difference in the lives of Survivors

by DarleneOuimet on May 18, 2010

in Healing & Recovery,Moving On,Self Care,Survivor and Supporter's Blogs

overcoming abuse and domestic violenceI have such an affinity for survivors and the struggles that we go through on the road to healing. I see the pain inside a survivor of sexual abuse or domestic violence. I see the brokenness, I feel it too and I understand the trust issues and remember the feelings of hopelessness. But I also see the beauty, the possibility and the uniqueness and gifts in each person who survives and I know that with recovery comes freedom and when we find freedom it is never too late to live up to your full and true potential.

Angela Shelton talks about recovery and potential on her video about raising money for this site in order to make a series of helpful videos. She talks about her journey making the documentary “Searching for Angela Shelton” and how the lives of all the women she found were impacted. It is an amazing story. Like Angela, I have a heart for this work. I am passionate about the healing process. I am dedicated to the message of surviving to thriving on the journey to wholeness. There is life after abuse; full life, rewarding and amazing life. Like Angela, I am passionate about contributing to the solution.

On my blog, “Emerging from Broken”, I try to write about how I got to where I am today; how I worked through the issues, how I realized that they were not my fault, that I didn’t deserve them. There is no magic bullet but there is some sense and order to the process. There were some really amazing things in the process of recovery that I realized looking back were a huge part of the wall that was between me and overcoming the past. I try to articulate the obstacles and the victories.

I can honestly tell you that I don’t feel the pain of the memories anymore and I don’t have the burning anger, or the feelings of shame. I have not forgotten, but I don’t re-live the abuse anymore and the nightmares no longer come. I am free of the resentment over having my innocence taken from me, and from feeling like my life was ripped off. I feel safe most of the time. I have come a long long way when it comes to trust, especially self trust. This is a gift beyond my wildest dreams or expectations. Really, I just wanted to be “okay”. I never dreamed that I could live in such wholeness, fullness and freedom. I never dreamed that I would be a mental health advocate because I believed that I was crazy, invalid, unimportant, used, unlovable, damaged and unworthy. I never dreamed that I could make a positive difference in the world because of my past, but each day I reach for the stars, and I do.

To your dreams; may they be realized,

Darlene Ouimet

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  • PhotoGirlRen

    I love this article. I cannot wait to not have to relive the abuse anymore. I was physically abused by my alcoholic parents, sexually abused as a teen, and then physically abused by previous boyfriends. The most bizarre thing, was that I didn't even realize I had a problem with myself until very recently. I have sought out counseling to discover I have anxiety, depression, PTSD and Dissociative Identity Disorder. I feel as though I have a LOT to overcome, but I am doing it. Look forward to more of your articles.

  • DarleneOuimet

    Thanks PhotoGirl,
    I didn't realize what the heck was going on with me for a long time either! That is part of what I call the fog ~ it is what we learn growing up with abuse, even mental abuse, or even just not learning that we have vaule. Good for you that you are overcoming! Hugs, Darlene

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